Take a look at the below list of the most popular goals on 43things.com.
I’m not sure if you can spot a theme, but I can see one that emerges, most all of these top 100 goals can be summarized into just a handful; People want to lose weight, be happy, make more and save more money, get out of debt, find a lover, and make more friends. But why? Why do people want to lose weight? My guess is they want to look better to be more attractive to others and or to live longer, they could really care less about losing weight. Why do people want to find a lover? The facts are, even if you do find someone to fall in love with, chances are it won’t work out with them, so in the end you’ll end up worse off. The same thing with marriage. Why do people want to make and save more money or get out of debt? They want to be free from money and its constraints. They could really give a shit less about making more money or even saving more, they simply want to not have to worry about it at all. Why more friends? People have a desire to have more influence and a higher social standing among their peers, not necessarily friends.
Why am I saying this? Why am I saying that every one of these goals listed above is really an ulterior motive for something else? Because most all of these people could really care less about achieving their goal, and thus never will. They just want the results. If the activity it takes to achieve the final result is not fun or enjoyable, chances are they will quit. Most everyone would love to have a solid body, but almost nobody wants to do the work for months to attain it. We all want the quick fix to attain results. That’s why diet pills continue to fly off the shelves, loads of worthless exercise equipment is sold and goes unused after a few days, and so on.
The same thing is true for personal finance and making more money and saving it. If your true goal is to be free from the worries of money, not necessarily making or saving more, because you know that actually requires work, you need to figure out how to best free yourself from having money control you and your happiness. The reality is, even if you had more money, you would simply spend more and always want more and more. That’s a never ending cycle that will most likely end in being unhappy, versus what you really want, to not worry about money.
It’s time to change your goals and be realistic. Instead of wanting to make and save more money, be real, just say you don’t want to be constrained by money. You want to be free to spend what you want when you want on the things that make you happy. For me, that would be being able to vacation several times a year and have a big house with a big backyard for my family. When you really decide what it is that makes you happy, you will have an easier time in seeing the point in earning more, saving more, and getting out of debt. Otherwise, you won’t stick to achieving your goal for very long.
After you’ve decided what’s really important to you, then it’s time to take the next steps to figure out how to get there. Besides changing the way you think about things, I will show you how to change your spending habits so you can be free from money constraints so you can buy the things you really want, help you to attack your debt and eliminate it, automate a savings plan, and set a date to quit working for good. Over the next few weeks I will take you on this journey and help you become free.